Crazy!

This is inspired by a list I saw in Facebook and I thought I'd do one too. What are the wildest, craziest, riskist things you have ever done in your life? Here's my list. See if you can beat it!


Drank a glass of fresh snake blood in China

Half a glass, actually. I was in Guilin with my dad. We were in a kind of snake restaurant. This guy sliced open a snake and drained the blood into a glass. Then he added some alcohol. The people there kept asking if we wanted it, like they couldn't wait to snatch it from us. My dad turned his back for a moment and was shocked when he found I had gulped it all down! Hahaha! Could only taste the alcohol, though.

Ate "balut" in Manila

Balut is duck egg, boiled just before the duckling hatches. You peel off the shell at the top of the egg and add a bit of sauce. Then you sorta suck the contents out, feathers and all!












Ate monitor lizard in Medan

Guy on a bicycle sold pieces of lizard hot in banana leaf. A bit tough but tastes like chicken. :)














Spent a night outside a girl's apartment trying to impress her

Not exactly like in the cartoon - I didn't have a guitar and I didn't sing! I tried to sleep in the car but it was hot and I got eaten alive by mosquitoes! She rejected me just the same! Said she'll call the police if I didn't get lost! :)






















Cried for a week after attending a girl's wedding dinner

Met her after she was registered to another guy. We got along fantastic. She looked so beautiful in her wedding dress. Broke my heart into pieces. Such is life.


















Nearly drowned when I got sucked under a waterfall

Never swim under a waterfall. The force of the plunging water pushes you downwards. Fortunately I managed to kick my way up. Swimming lessons are GOOD for you!

















Lost a few toe nails after a run through the jungle

I was wearing a cheap pair of track shoes when I participated in this Hash House cross-country run through some secondary forest. The jungle floor is uneven and full of roots. I managed to twist my ankle somewhere near the end and had to limp the rest of the way. When I took my shoes off, three of the toenails had turned black. The entire nails came off after a week or two!















Visited a Mormon temple all by my lonesome

That was during my Christian phase. I was very enthusiastic about saving these cultists from burning in hell, you see? I even had a long discussion with a Hare Krishna fellow once. The Mormon temple is very much like an old-fashioned church. They sing hymns!

On the left is a photo of a godly Mormon guy with his many wives and lovely brood of kids. Mormons also believe God hates black people and had marked them with dark skin.










Visited a mosque with my two kids

No big deal if you're a Muslim but non-Muslims will award you with a Badge of Courage for doing this! :)
























Handed out Christian literature to prostitutes in Sydney!

Probably the maddest thing I will ever do in my life and I did it all alone, driven by the conviction that God loved these ladies of the night. I took a bus from my house in the Eastern Suburbs to Kingscross in Sydney with a bag full of little New Testaments. You bet I was nervous. The girls were standing along the street waiting for customers. I tried giving a copy to a pretty girl who looked Chinese but she rejected me. That hurt. I approached a blond girl and she said, "Do you wanna go?" I said no and handed her a Bible. She said "Ta" and turned away. After that one success I chickened out completely and took off for home. Unfortunatedly the buses had already stopped running by that time - around 11pm, I guess. I called a Christian guy who came to pick me up. He was mighty impressed as you can imagine!

The Art of War

The Art of War by Sunzi is one of the most amazing books I have ever come across. Written by a Chinese general some 2,500 years ago, it still contains lessons that are absolutely relevant today. This is not a book review. I only want to list some of the points that are, to my mind, the most important. Incidentally, my version of the book has James Clavell as the "editor".

1) Discipline

Sunzi was once requested by a Chinese king to demonstrate the effectiveness of his ideas on a group of young women. He carefully explained the orders he would be issuing to the ladies and got them to stand to attention. "Right turn!" he called out. The ladies stood and giggled. "Left turn!" The ladies giggled some more. Sunzi very patiently explained his orders again. If the instructions were unclear, the commander was at fault, he stressed. The ladies acknowledged that they had understood the instructions. "Right turn!" he shouted again. The ladies laughed and did nothing. "Left turn!" More laughter. Sunzi promptly had the group leader, one of the king's favourite concubines, beheaded! Guess what? He had no more problems getting his orders obeyed!

Why did it require the combined might of the USSR, the UK, the US, Canada, Australia, etc to overcome a relatively small country like Germany in WW2? My answer: the Germans were highly disciplined.

2) Knowing your enemy and yourself

If you asked me, this is the very reason why the Americans lost in Vietnam (and why they will lose in Afghanistan). The Yanks did not understand the Vietnamese language, culture, spirit, aspirations, etc, and cared less. They arrogantly assumed that they could beat anyone into submission with enough bombs and bullets. As a result, they got their neo-colonial asses whipped.

3) Breaking resistance without fighting

This is not something you would have heard from American Generals like Douglas MacArthur, who had built a career on a mountain of dead bodies. When the Japanese kicked him out of the Philippines, he declared "I shall return!" Years later, the Yanks could have bypassed Luzon island on their way to Japan but MacArthur had to "return" or lose face. The ensuing needless battle for Manila killed 100,000 Filipinos and destroyed the city. Just so a vainglorious general could keep his promise!

Sunzi, on the other hand, preferred not to fight, if at all possible. (Does that sound like he was advocating diplomacy?) If not possible, then fighting should be done in such a way as to minimise casualties and waste. The German blitzkrieg (lightning war) for example, was highly efficient in the use of speed and power to knock an enemy out before he could seriously react.

4) Prisoners and civilians should be well treated

In my opinion, the Rape of Nanjing was a public relations disaster for the Japanese army. What they really intended was to crush Chinese resistance once and for all, via a demonstration of extremely barbarity on the capital of China. But the war was far from over at that point. If you were a Chinese soldier and you knew you would be mercilessly tortured and then executed if you surrendered, would you give up or fight to the death? If the Chinese soldier would no longer surrender, wouldn't life be much harder for the Japanese soldier? The Germans made the same mistake during the Battle of the Bulge. US prisoners were massacred by the SS, which only strengthened American resolve to keep fighting.

5) Holding positions that cannot be attacked

Sounds like common sense, doesn't it? But I've seen lots of people on internet forums get shot to pieces by exposing themselves to fire. If a position cannot be defended, move to a better one, dummy! I will blog more on this later - maybe!

6) Maintaining an army at a distance will impoverish the people

Which dumb-ass nation is conducting wars miles and miles away from home and has consequently gone bankrupt? Give yourself a pat on the back if you answered "the USA!"

Isn't it astonishing how smart Sunzi was compared to some of our modern-day world leaders?

(Art work by Anna Lorimer.)